


Nightmares Will Come

by Fanatic_weirdo



Series: Lightwood-Bane Family [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Big Brother/Little Brother, Domestic Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, M/M, Nightmares, Protective Magnus Bane, poor rafael
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-10
Updated: 2017-11-14
Packaged: 2019-01-31 15:55:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12685065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fanatic_weirdo/pseuds/Fanatic_weirdo
Summary: Rafael has a nightmare while Alec is away. Better than it sounds I promise lol





	1. Nightmare

**Author's Note:**

> This is one I'm very proud of. I don't own anyone you recognize. Hope you all enjoy!!

The scream that woke Magnus simultaneously made his blood freeze in his veins. Before his boys, Magnus had been hard to shake, being over four hundred years old would do that to a person. Now, however with two children, he was no more able to stand their pain than Alec was. He shoved off his deep red comforter, knowing Alec would follow him, he was halfway to Rafael's room before he remembered Alec was in Idris on Institute business. That didn't stop him from throwing his son's door open, ready to defeat whatever caused his son's distress.

Magnus stopped short at what was before him. Rafael was still asleep, tossing and turning, his blue stripped sheets wrapped around him, entangling him like ropes. Tears streamed down his face as he muttered Spanish words in a heartbroken, scared tone. Magnus exhaled sadly, even though he was glad it wasn't an external danger, he knew the mind could be worse than any physical danger. When Rafael moved in a year ago the nightmares had been every night. Magnus and Alec had been awoken to screams every single night for three months, and though neither of them minded, every time his pain filled cries hit his fathers' ears their hearts broke a little more. Then the dreams became less frequent. Within seven months the nightmares stopped making their child scream, and instead, on the rare occasion that it did happen they just sent Rafael into their bedroom with a gentle, shy knock and a request to sleep with them.

It had taken a while for Rafael to speak at all, let alone talk about his nightmares. When he finally did, it was actually one of the mornings after he'd come into bed with them. Alec had retrieved a sleepy Max and the four had been cuddling in bed. Max, three years old at the time, was curled into Rafael's side and Rafael had been pulling at a thread on his pajamas.

"They're about about mi madre and padre, well most of them are," he'd said so softly Magnus had almost missed it. Alec and his sharp hearing had been the one to pick up on it.

"What are?" Alec asked.

"My sueños," Rafael muttered, "My dreams," he repeated in accented English. "It's of them being mur-" he paused looking down at Max who was looking up at his big brother sadly. 

"What I imagine must have happened to them." He smiled weakly at Max, trying to comfort the toddler who had grabbed his hand and held it. Rafael had only been a baby when his parents had died so he didn't have any actual memories but Magnus knew a parent's death was never something that you truly got over, even if you didn't know them

"Papa!" Magnus flinched, as Rafael’s agonized voice pulled him out of the memory. This nightmare seemed to be another one about losing his biological parents. "Por favor, Papa,"  
Magnus's heart shattered at the pain in the six-year old's voice. He sat carefully on the edge of the bed as the six year old, drenched in sweat, released broken sobs, some catching in his throat, others being released fully and achingly wet. 

"DADDY!" This caused Magnus to blink in surprise. Papa and Daddy were what Max called him and Alec, Rafael still called them Alec and Magnus. "Daddy, save-" he moaned.

"Rafael," Magnus cooed quietly, touching his arm gently. He knew from experience with Alec that waking a Shadowhunter, even an untrained one, from a nightmare could have consequences. Rafael pulled away from the feeling, whimpering and yelping and Magnus flinched, hating how deeply into the nightmare Rafael was. 

"Papa," a soft voice came from the doorway. Magnus looked to see Max standing there with his blanket, his face scrunched in sleep and worry. "Is Rafe okay?" As if answering, Rafael curled into himself, crying out weakly. Max ran over to the opposite side of the bed and moved to touch Rafael but Magnus shook his head quickly, holding his hand flat, waving it to prevent Max from grabbing the distressed boy. 

"Rafe, it's me, it's Magnus sweetheart, it's me." Magnus tried again to shake him gently. Rafael sobbed once again but his eyes opened, wide and panicked. "It's okay, you're safe."

"Papa!" he cried, crawling into Magnus's arms. "Papa, you died, you and Daddy died and I was alone again and-" Rafael froze, though he didn't release his grip of Magnus, "Where's Daddy? Is he...?" he whined frightened, looking around frantically for Alec. His gaze found Max who looked terrified. 

"It was just a bad dream," Magnus soothed. Rafael paused before looking at Magnus,

"Where is Daddy?" he whimpered softly. Rafael sounded as if the wrong answer would completely destroy him.

"He's just in Idris, remember? He'll be home tomorrow," Magnus reminded him, running his fingers through Rafael's black hair.

"But what if something happens? It happened in Idris that's wh-where you-you both died." he said as tears began flowing down his cheeks and onto Magnus's tank top. Well, it was  
Alec's but he always slept in his husband's clothes when he was away.

"Shhhh shhhh, he's fine, I promise," Magnus said softly, rubbing Rafael's back now.

"Can you go get him? Por favor?" Rafael begged. Then as he thought about it he stopped and grabbed Magnus's shirt harder. "No, you can't go. If you're both in Idris… No, no no,"

"Rafael, Rafe, look at me," Magnus tried to get his attention. Rafael slowly looked at him, sobs still catching in his throat. "I will call him, if that will make you feel better," Magnus offered. Rafael nodded desperately. "Okay, I'll go get my phone and-"

"No!" Rafael said, holding onto Magnus even tighter.

"Hey, it's okay, I just meant-" he snapped his fingers and his phone appeared in his hand. Rafael let out a shaky breath and turned back to Max who had tears in his eyes. He reached out and pulled the blue four-year-old onto the bed with him.

"Lo siento, Maxie, I didn't mean to upset you," Rafael whispered putting one arm around Max, while still refusing to release Magnus.

"Bien, Rafe, está bien," Max nodded, wrapping both arms around Rafael's waist. Magnus smiled, knowing that the main reason Rafael had managed to open up as much as he had to them was because of the little blue Warlock hugging him as tightly as he could. Max had shown Rafael that he was a part of the family, that being his big brother and Alec and Magnus's son was real, it was happening and it could be a good thing. Magnus knew he didn't have to worry about waking Alec, he'd already be awake with the time difference from Brooklyn and Idris. The phone rang three times before Alec picked up. 

"What's wrong?" Alec asked before even saying hello.

"Rafael had a nightmare about losing us," Magnus admitted, using the hand that wasn't holding the phone to rub Rafael's back.

"Can I talk to him?" Rafael asked looking at Magnus anxiously.

"He wants to talk to you," Magnus said,

"Of course," Alec responded, Magnus handed Rafael the phone who frantically grabbed it, pressing it against his face.

"Daddy," he said worriedly. "Are you okay? Has anything bad happened?" Magnus knew Alec would be surprised to hear the six-year-old call him Daddy. Alec had wanted nothing more than for Rafael to be able to trust and love them enough, and feel enough like a member of the family to call them ‘Daddy’ and ‘Papa’. He could hear Alec's soothing, gruff voice on the other side. Alec had taken to being a father quicker than Magnus did, especially with the smaller things. Magnus had always wanted to be a father but had long ago given up on that dream, until he met Alexander, his beautiful Shadowhunter that not only loved him better than he ever dreamed he could be, but showed him that he could have that last part of his life that was missing; children.

Dreaming of children and actually having them were two very different things. The first time Max had gotten a low fever, Magnus had freaked out so much Alec sent him out of the then infant's nursery. He'd wanted to heal him with magic but Alec had insisted that he fight it off on his own, something all babies had to do. Magnus had said some things that he wasn't proud of, things he still regretted, even three and a half years later. Alec was better at this sort of thing too, when Rafael had nightmares. Magnus would swear he had a special kind of magic of his own that Magnus would never be able to practice as well as his husband.

"You'll be home when I wake up?" Rafael's voice broke Magnus out of this thoughts. Alec must have answered affirmatively because Rafael nodded even though he had tears in his eyes. Rafael listened for another few seconds than nodded once more, "I love you too, Daddy," Magnus very greatly suspected that Alec would have to hold back tears at hearing those five words. "You wanna talk to Papa again? Okay."

Magnus looked back at Rafael to see him holding the phone back to him and snuggled up against his side once again. 

"Hey, love," he actually greeted his husband this time. 

"He called me Daddy," Magnus had been right, Alec's voice cracked with emotion.

"I know," Magnus smiled

"And he called you Papa!" Alec said equally as excited for Magnus.

"I know,” Magnus laughed softly, looking down at their sons. "So you'll be home tomorrow morning?"

"Yeah, right after this meeting," Alec said, revealing the reason it had taken him three rings to answer.

"Oh you were in a meeting?" Magnus asked, part of him pleased that members of the Clave were inconvenienced.

"Yeah my family comes first, always has, always will," Alec said with that no nonsense tone of his and Magnus had to wonder if there were other Shadowhunters still in the room. 

"You want me to wait up for you?" Magnus asked.

"That’d be great. I can’t wait to see you three, it feels like I’ve been here weeks.” Alec said, sounding tired and Magnus knew it had nothing to do with jet lag. Magnus knew there were people in Idris, possibly in the room with Alec right now that still hadn’t fully, or even slightly, accepted that Alec and he were married and that they had adopted Max.  
Magnus could see Rafael calming, looking up at the happy expression on Magnus's face and knew that the adults weren't lying to protect him, both of them really were safe and Alec would be home soon. Rafael smiled, nuzzling in relief into Max who snuggled right back. Magnus had been a little surprised that Max hadn't demanded to speak to Alec as well, but maybe he had put his childhood instinct away and knew this was about Rafael.

“We are all going to be very glad to see you too, I don’t know how I do anything without you, Alexander," Magnus reported. Alec smiled, though Magnus couldn't see it, he could feel it. 

"Okay, go back to your meeting so it can be over and you can come home," Magnus instructed.

"Yes, Sir," Alec agreed, "I love you. And tell the boys I love them too."

Magnus agreed and ended the call. 

"Daddy says he loves you both," both boys smiled and nodded. "So who wants to have a sleep over in my bed until he gets home?" 

They both jumped up in excitement. Max grabbed Magnus by the neck, expecting to be carried while Rafael paused, waiting for his papa. Magnus put Max on one hip and held the other arm open for Rafael to join. "I've got one for each of you," he claimed. Rafael smiled softly and wrapped his arms around Magnus's neck as well and hooked onto his hip, laying his head on Magnus's shoulder. The past thirty minutes and the dream had taken a lot out of him. He felt like he hadn't slept at all.  
As soon as Magnus laid them down, both boys fell asleep, one on each side of him, but they had joined their hands in the middle, on Magnus's abdomen. Magnus lay there waiting for Alec and thought about all the things he had now that he wouldn't give up for anything on Earth. He knew Alexander Gideon Lightwood had been something special the moment he laid eyes on him and if their time together was limited (not that Magnus wasn't still looking for ways to make it unlimited) then he was going to make it the best short amount of time in his long life.

He could feel himself dozing off when soft lips, the most familiar lips in the world, pressed against his.

"Mmmm, Casanova," Magnus moaned into the lips, earning himself instant removal of said lips and a smack to the chest. He opened his eyes, giggling.

"You're an asshole," Alec claimed in a whisper so that he didn't wake the boys, but Magnus could see the twinkle in his eyes, knowing how to play this game as well as Magnus. He kissed Max on the head before he moved across the room and took his shirt off and pulled a tank top back on and a pair of boxers. "I should sleep on the couch to punish you," Alec made an empty threat, especially since he was already crawling into bed, Rafael squeezed between them.

"But that would punish you most, because I have two wonderful cuddling partners and you would be all alone," Magnus joked. Alec sighed softly,

"And I've been alone enough lately," he said it so quietly Magnus wondered if he'd heard it right.

"Hey," Magnus carefully reached over Rafael and cupped his hand under Alec's chin.

"I don't like going to Idris, even if I am going by portal. I missed him calling us Papa and Daddy for the first time. I mean I don't like that it was out of distress but I should have been here." Alec murmured quietly as he comfortingly tightened his grip on Rafael. 

"Alexander, you can't be here every minute of the day. How do you think I felt that I missed Max's first word because I was at that stupid warlock convention that happens once every 200 years?" Alec knew Magnus was right, but it didn't make it any easier. He brushed Rafael's uncontrollable hair out of his eyes with his fingers, stirring the light sleeper. He blinked his eyes opened slowly and found Alec's face and smiled sleepily.

"You're home," Rafael said happily.

"Mhmm, told you I would be," Alec responded, kissing Rafael's forehead. Rafael released Max's hand and turned enough to wrap his arms around Alec's neck and laid his head on his father's shoulder. Rafael was asleep again before they knew it and Alec smiled softly at the fact that Rafael had pressed himself fully against Alec, reassuring himself that Alec was indeed there. Max felt the change and woke long enough to crawl over Magnus and next to Rafael, waving at Alec with a quiet "Hi Daddy," before falling back asleep. Alec looked at the boys for a moment before his eyes fell back on Magnus.

"I missed you," he whispered. Magnus nodded, shifting on to his side carefully.

"I missed you too," Alec turned as much as he could without waking up Rafael to face Magnus.

"Forty-eight hours really is a very long time, Alexander," Magnus claimed. Alec hummed, 

"You don't have to tell me that, at least you had the boys. I was stuck in a stuffy place with stuffy Clave officials," Alec rolled his eyes. Magnus chuckled silently and pulled Alec's hand to his to kiss his palm, affectionately. "Clary was the only thing that made it slightly bearable, and mostly because we spent the meetings passing notes about how much we missed you and Jace," Alec claimed.

Magnus smiled sweetly and kissed the tips of Alec's fingers. Alec smiled at the ministration, it was so good to be home. To not have people ask in a demeaning tone how his family was, the clear judgement of being married to a Downworlder still heavy in their voices and looks, despite it being nearly a decade since he'd been with Magnus. Looking at his family beside him, he just could not understand how someone could think less of them. His beautiful husband who turned Alec into the best possible version of himself by showing him that who he was, was good enough. His incredible little Max, who fully accepted and loved others, even if they weren't so accepting of him purely based on the color of his skin and who his biological father was. And Rafael, who had been through hell, had lived on his own for the most important time in his life when it came to bonding and learning trust, and yet the young Shadowhunter was learning to trust them, and to love them, especially the little blue warlock next to him. Alec loved his family, and he would fight for them over and over, never letting anyone tell them they were less of a family because they cared more about each other than what the Clave thought of them.

The next morning Max was the first to open his eyes, at first confused as to where he was; his sheets were purple not gray, and why did he feel squished? Then he saw who he was being squished by and merely snuggled deeper under the cover and closer to his Papa. Rafael felt the movement and woke up, blinking sleepily at his brother. Rafael put his finger over his lips to make sure his brother didn't wake up their fathers.

"Let's fix them breakfast," Rafael whispered directly in Max's ear so he didn't have to get loud. Max nodded excitedly and they slowly and carefully crawled out of bed and tip-toed into the kitchen. Alec smirked and cracked one eye open as he watched them leave, Max in his onesie dinosaur pajamas and Rafael in his black basketball shorts and tee shirt, both unaware they'd awoken him. Alec didn't mind and he closed the gap between he and Magnus and buried his face in Magnus's neck, kissing the skin there before falling back into a light sleep.  
The next time he woke up, less than twenty minutes later, it was to fingers tickling his sides lightly and soft kisses pressing onto his lips.

"Mmm, morning." he whispered, opening his eyes to his handsome partner. Magnus had stopped glamoring his eyes when he was at home and it got a hard approval from Alec, who thought there was nothing more beautiful than his warlock's cat like eyes. The yellow glowed slightly in the dark room, blinking less often than Alec, as if trying not to have to close them and block his view of the Shadowhunter. Alec knew they still scared some people, but he thought they were the most mesmerizing things on earth.

"Good morning, Angel," Magnus replied, his voice scratchy and hoarse from lack of use. "What do you think the chances are that the boys are asleep in their own beds?" The sound of a plastic bowl clattering to the ground answered that question.

"Well there goes that," Alec said with a laugh in his voice.

"Max! Careful!" Rafael cried.

"Shhhhhh!" Max said louder than Rafael had spoken. Magnus and Alec chuckled, still nuzzled together, knowing they should go see what trouble the boys were getting into, but they were both still warm and soft with sleep and still slightly desperate in how much they missed each other, even after just a night and a half apart. They spent the next ten minutes before rising out of bed, exchanging quiet, gently kisses and whispering as if sharing secrets. They played with each other's hands, pressing finger tips and intertwining the digits, their palms slid together before detaching them and tickling each other's palms delicately. Alec still felt like a teenager around Magnus sometimes, moments like this made him feel like their love was still new and wondrous.

It was the giggles of two children that brought them out of their bubble. They turned to see a very excited four year old and a bashful, nervous six year old standing in their doorway with grins on their face.

"Get up! Get up! We made you breakfast!" Max said excitedly. Alec turned back to Magnus beaming before nodding and rolling over to get out of bed. Magnus didn't roll off his side but instead followed Alec and when Alec sat up on the side of the bed with his legs off the side Magnus wrapped his arms around Alec's waist and kissed the soft spot just below his ear. Earning a soft sigh and smile from Alec. "You guys are gross," Max groaned, covering his eyes. Rafael giggled shyly and tucked his head. Neither of them knew that Alec and Magnus never imagined they'd get a love like this, let alone a family, so they were going to enjoy every second of it, gross or not.

"I hope you get this kind of gross love one day, Blueberry," Magnus said, releasing Alec and moving to the edge of the bed to sit next to him instead. "Took me a long time to find it, so  
I'm going to be as gross as I want," Magnus teased, leaning in to kiss Alec's lips. Alec obliged, laughing into the kiss.

"Daddddyyyy, Paaaapppppaaaaa," Max whined, "Breakfast is getting cold!" He stamped his feet a little causing Alec to roll his eyes affectionately before standing up and grabbing Magnus by the hands to pull him up. He pulled hard enough to catch Magnus in yet another kiss before motioning the boys to lead the way.

The kitchen was a disaster. It looked like a train had gone through it. Every bowl the couple owned and a few they were pretty sure they didn't, were splayed across the counter in varying degrees up falling over. There was what appeared to be flour on the ceiling, counter and floor, as well as coating the kitchen sink. There were also enough egg shells and uncooked egg spillage to feed all of Brooklyn, on every surface of the room. Alec froze before looking at Magnus,

"I'm glad you have magic because I-" he whispered, shaking his head. Magnus chuckled and nodded,

"I just hope it's edible" he murmured causing Alec to laugh. "Did you try to use magic, Maxie?" Max blushed and nodded sheepishly.

"It didn't go so good so Rafe made it, but I stirred!" he responded, pushing Rafael lightly forward since he'd blushed even harder than Max at attention being brought to him.

"Oh yay! I'm excited now!" Magnus exclaimed, getting a glare from Max, whom he scooped up and made squeal while Rafael blushed at the compliment. At first they'd been extremely wary of the fact that the then five year old claimed to know how to cook, especially without adult help and supervision. But one day they agreed to let him go for it, while watching carefully from the kitchen table, they'd been shocked and amazed at how skilled he was. They had yet to find out where and how he learned to cook so well.

"Spanish omelettes!" Alec said excitedly when he saw the plates on the table.

"I made coffee too, Alec," Alec's smile fell off his face at Rafael's words. Alec? What happened to Daddy? Magnus looked unsure and sad as well but they knew they couldn't say anything because Rafael had to move at his own pace. Alec quickly forced himself to smile again.

"I'll get it, thank you so much boys." Magnus could hear him trying to hide the hurt, Max however didn't bother with patience or understanding.

"Rafe, their names are Daddy and Papa, you called them that last night, 'member?" Rafael looked embarrassed but whether because he'd forgotten or because he'd been called out, they weren't sure.

"Max," Magnus said gently, "He can call us Magnus and Alec for as long as he wants, remember we talked about it?"

Alec smiled softly at Rafael who looked up at him sadly.

"It's okay, bud, you call us what you want, whenever you want," he encouraged. Rafael bit his lower lip, something Magnus swore he got from Alec, despite the fact he'd done it since the day he moved in.

"I want to-" Rafael cut himself off, looking at his feet. Magnus and Alec waited patiently for him to continue but instead of speaking he ran to his bedroom. Alec was positive he saw tears before he'd turned around. They looked at each other before Alec headed into the bedroom, Magnus scooped up Max before he followed.  
Rafael hadn't closed his door, probably because he was still getting used to having a door. He was on his bed, which was still unmade from the night before, the navy blue comforter shoved at the foot of the bed, the sheets still scrambled below him. Rafael had his face buried in his arms, but Alec didn't need to see his face to know he was crying, the subtle but still very present trembling gave him away.

"Rafie, I didn't mean to make you cry," Max said heartbroken. Magnus pet his hair and kissed his temple before putting him on the ground and he ran over to same side he'd stood next to last night.

"Hey, Rafe," Alec said softly, carefully sitting down on the bed. Rafael didn't move but the shaking grew harder. "Baby, we didn't mean to upset you," he cautiously put his hand on Rafael's back. Rafael stopped shaking but he was holding his breath to stop himself.

"Can you look at us?" Magnus asked soothingly. Rafael shook his head rapidly as he exhaled a wet sob. Alec and Magnus looked at each other, neither of them really knew how to do this. This wasn't a scrapped knee, or even a nightmare, this was much more and it needed to be handled delicately.

"Okay, can we talk and you listen?" Alec requested. There was a moment of stillness before Rafael nodded. Alec sighed quietly in relief, at least he wanted them in the room. "We don't mind if you call us by our names, we want you to be comfortable and happy and safe and if that means we are Magnus and Alec to you forever, then that's what we'll be, happily." Alec said in a gentle, caring tone. Magnus smiled at his husband, he was born to be a father.

"We love you, Rafe," Magnus said. "We know you've gone through a lot in the past year and we just want to make it as easy for you as possible."  
Rafael spoke into his arms but neither Alec or Magnus could understand it.

"What did you say?" Alec asked, rubbing Rafael's now still shoulders, hoping it encouraged him to turn around. Slowly Rafael turned his face to them, breaking both their hearts as his cheeks were flush and wet and his eyes were puffy and sad.

"I want to call you Papa and Daddy," Rafael admitted, barely above a whisper. Magnus wanted to cheer but since Rafael was still in tears and curled into himself like a frightened hedgehog, he knew there was much more to tell. "But I've never-" he cut himself off, his voice cracking and catching in his throat. "Mi madre y mi padre murieron antes de que podría llamarlos nada," Rafael cried, tears streaming down his face. "That's not because of you, I just...I've never had a Papa or a Mama, I've always been alone, and I don't think I know how to do this." 

"We don't either, Rafe," Magnus stated. "This is a new thing for us too, but I do know one thing; you will never be alone again. We will be here for you no matter what, you are our son and what you choose or are able to call us, doesn't change that one bit." Rafael looked up at him and smiled weakly.

"You promise?" he asked meekly.

"With all our hearts," Alec responded. His smiled widened slightly and he sat up, scooting over when he noticed Max was climbing on the bed. Rafael was up against Alec who smiled, comfortingly at him and wrapped his arms around his small shoulders.

"But what about my dream? You died and I was alone!" Rafael squeaked, remembering his nightmare for the first time.

"I won't lie to you and say we're gonna live forever," Alec stated, "In fact, I can guarantee I won't." Magnus flinched violently and Max pouted, not truly understanding that situation. "But I can tell you that this family, including your aunts and uncles, we are really hard to get rid of, ask any demons that have tried." Rafael smiled sadly, but Alec continued. "What I can guarantee though, is that Magnus and I will love you forever and ever." Magnus nodded in agreement, though his mind stayed on Alec's guarantee of his mortality.

"I think I love you guys too, you make me feel happy and safe," Rafael reported. Alec pulled him in closer and reached over to Max and pulled him in as well,

"That's what matters," he said.

"Oh no!" Max said distraught, the other three looked at him alarmed, "Breakfast is gonna be cold!" He pouted but the rest of them laughed,

"Well Max, it's probably a good thing Papa is a warlock, he can fix that right up." Alec's face lit up at the word Papa and he looked at Magnus who he was probably expecting to have the same expression, instead Magnus pulled him into a deep, but gentle kiss, trying to put all his feelings of love and fear into the kiss. When they parted Alec looked a little bewildered but also concerned.

"Magn-?" He began but Magnus picked Rafael up and threw him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, causing their son to scream with laughter. Alec chuckled but then it faded because he knew very well that Magnus was upset about something and had attempted to distract them from it as soon as possible. Now was perhaps not the time for that, he'd bring that up later, perhaps when the boys were napping. For now, it was time for breakfast.

"Last one at the table is a rotten egg!" Alec cried, chasing his husband and sons into the kitchen.


	2. Nap time convo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this was never going to be continued but poo_tee_weet suggested it and inspiration hit me. This is the conversation had about Alec's morality. I may turn these family fics into a series as they are all the same kids and all happen in the same universe. We'll see. Hope you guys enjoy!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Allusion to sexy times at the end but in no way graphic

The boys had gone down for their naps relatively easy, Max was always going to fight them, but with being awoken that night from the nightmare as well as Alec coming home, it hadn’t taken him long to give in. Alec wasn’t so sure he wasn’t going to try to convince Magnus to join him for a nap as well. The time difference of Idris plus the fighting he had to do every time he was there, exhausted him. 

Magnus scrubbed his face, as he stared at the kitchen counter, once again clean from the creative liberties taken by the boys at breakfast. Alec wrapped his arms around him, kissing him just behind his ear, usually a sensitive spot that caused Magnus to tilt his head to give Alec more room to continue or shiver or at the very least smile, this time, Alec got nothing. 

“Want to tell me what’s on your mind?” Alec said gently, giving his husband full range to say ‘not right now’ or to start spilling what had upset him earlier that day. Alec replayed the conversation with Rafael in his head, trying to find what he’d missed. Rafael had cried, which Alec knew would never not break his heart, and been so conflicted about what to call them, about what he felt comfortable calling them. Alec truly didn’t care. Of course he’d loved when his little boy called him Daddy, but being called Alec by him didn’t make him less his son. He would be Rafael’s father no matter his title. 

\----------  
“But what about my dream? You died and I was alone!" Rafael squeaked, remembering his nightmare for the first time."  
"I won't lie to you and say we're gonna live forever," Alec stated, "In fact, I can guarantee I won't."

\----------

Oh. 

That was always a bit of tender subject for both of them.

“Magnus-“ Alec began but paused when Magnus leaned into him, as if his body was suddenly too heavy for Magnus to carry the weight on alone. Magnus crossed his arms and interlocked their hands, holding them a little too tightly for Alec to not be worried. “Babe…” He tried to pull Magnus around but Magnus refused to budge and just pulled Alec’s arms tighter around him. 

“You told Rafe you were going to die,” Magnus whispered. They didn’t enjoy talking about it, neither of them liked to be reminded of the fact that one of them was going to outlive the other. Alec sighed softly, putting his head on Magnus’s shoulder.

“I know,” Alec agreed, kissing the fabric under his mouth. “It’s going to be a rough conversation to have in the future, especially with Max and I-“ Abruptly Magnus pulled away, almost hurting Alec with the force of which he separated their hands. 

“I can’t,” Magnus murmured. Alec blinked slowly at him. He couldn’t what? Be without him? Tell Max? Watch him die?

“Can’t what?” Alec asked, reaching out again but Magnus moved again, not allowing Alec to touch him.

“I can’t imagine my life without you,” Magnus whispered. “I try, I picture coming to this apartment or any apartment and not finding your bow and arrows by the door or your jacket hanging at the door. Not having your stupid coffee cup perpetually in the sick because for some reason you have an aversion to putting in the dishwasher and-“ A harsh, broken sob ripped out of Magnus’s chest. This time Alec wouldn’t let Magnus push him away and he pulled him into a hug, shushing him affectionately. “It’s so empty, Alexander, even with Rafe and Max, you are the reason I have them, you are the reason I have anything in my life worth having and I don’t know what I am going to do without you.” Magnus sobbed into Alec’s shoulder, gripping the back of his tee shirt like it was the only thing keeping him tethered to reality and away from that awful future. Magnus tried to keep his sobs quiet because he certainly didn’t want the boys waking up to this, but the pain that coursed through him was worse than any physical trauma he’d ever endured. The sound forced itself out of Magnus no matter how hard he tried to keep it in, coming out in choking moans. 

“Magnus,” Alec’s voice sounded wet too, as if he too were crying, but when Magnus managed to stop crying and pull back enough to look, his face was dry, but his eyes were sad and dull. “It is never my goal to cause you pain. I would do anything to take it away from you, but I there is something we need to talk about,” Alec lead him carefully to their bedroom, this wasn’t a conversation to be had in the common space. Alec sat down and guided Magnus to sitting next to him. He wiped away Magnus’s suffering with the pads of thumbs, being so compassionate that Magnus began to cry again. Alec smiled sadly at him, kissing his forehead and tracing the lines of his face with his thumbs. 

“My angel,” Magnus whimpered. Alec pressed his lips together before tugging his lower lip with his teeth.

“If you had something right now to make me immortal, I would take it. I have thought about this and being immortal would be a blessing I would be honored to accept, if it meant never leaving you, Rafael and Max, I wouldn’t even hesitate.” Magnus blinked up at him, he knew Alec wasn’t against immortality but to have it put like that, in a way that was so blatantly about staying with Magnus, it wasn’t something Magnus wasn’t used to. Even Magnus’s immortal lovers didn’t want to spend eternity with him, hell they were the ones most eager to get out of the relationships, not being able to bare the idea of spending forever with Magnus Bane. But here Alec was, choosing immortally only because it would include Magnus. Magnus’s eyes were filled with tears yet again. 

“But babe, I could become immortal today and die tomorrow, or next week,” Magnus flinched, the once again lonely future in store for him hitting him like a bolder. “I’m a Shadowhunter, and sometimes we die young, Hell I would be dead already if it weren’t for you, Warlock,” Alec smiled slightly, kissing Magnus’s lip in what was meant to be a quick, light kiss but Magnus grabbed his shoulders and deepened it, lengthened it. Alec let it happened, kissing back eagerly, touching Magnus’s waist and shifting them closer together. Magnus whined at the increased contact, desperate to feel as much as he could for as long as he could. 

When the need for proper breathing outweighed their need for each other, they parted, but only their lips, their foreheads remained pressed together. They’re oxygen remained shared, even as they panted minutely. 

“What I was trying to say,” Alec said with a smirk, trying to lighten the mood, as he cupped Magnus’s cheek in his hand. “Is that immortality isn’t promised, you could die tomorrow too. In our lines of work, anything could happen. But if you put this giant weight on my mortality, and you look toward it like it is a great looming villain off in the distant, you’re going to be too focused on that to appreciate every single second of our beautiful life together. I am so proud of this life, Magnus.” Alec whispered the last part, his lips brushing against Magnus’s cheek. Magnus closed his eyes, leaning into the touch. “I’m proud of us, and our beautiful family. And whether I grow old, or never grow old, I want it to be you by my side, and our boys being loved, and making their own choices for their lives. I am happy either way, mortality or immortality because I am choosing to spend however long my life is, with a man who saved my life, who kept me from making a stupid mistake that would have ruined me. You inspired me to choose myself, to choose my happiness, and to choose you. I love you Magnus Lightwood-Bane and I will love you until the last breath leaves my lungs, whenever that might be, and probably even after that.” Magnus had tears streaming down his cheeks by the time Alec was finished speaking. 

Alec was right, Magnus knew. He could worry about how short or long Alec’s life would be and end up missing it regardless. All he could do was enjoy his Shadowhunter now, as he was, for however long he had him. It didn’t mean that losing him would be any easier. It didn’t mean that the thought of there being an expiration date on their life together didn’t cause Magnus’s heart to clinch painfully, it just meant that Magnus couldn’t let that define their relationship. It wasn’t about mortality and immortality, it was about Alec and Magnus and their love which was eternal, even if the souls were not.

Magnus tucked himself into Alec’s arms, cleaning his face on Alec’s shirt, breathing in the scent that engulfed him in that moment. He relished the strong arms wrapped around him like a shield. He smiled against the pressure of lips being pressed against his face and neck. Alec tugged Magnus into a laying position onto the bed, facing each other like that had been this morning, somehow that felt like a lifetime ago. Magnus snapped his fingers and the sheet and comforter was on top of them and Alec dug a little deeper into both the warmth of Magnus and of the blankets.

“I bet you’re tired, want to nap?” Magnus offered, his voice hardly above a whisper as he and Alec exchanged soft, barely there kisses on each other’s skin. Alec hummed at the offer, he was indeed exhausted, however he had much more fun activities on his mind. He grinned impishly, a smile that Magnus would recognize anywhere, after all, he’d created it. 

“Mmmm, I can think of a much better to spend a couple hours,” Alec said and he slipped under the covers and crawled down Magnus’s body. Magnus chuckled at his husband’s antics but soon his chuckled turned into a gasp and he snapped his fingers again to sound proof the room, scarring their boys with their healthy sex life was not something either of them aimed to do.

“Oh fuck, Alexander,” Magnus moaned. Alec came off of him with a pop and poked his head out of the covers,

“There will be time for that later.” Magnus let out a laugh, capturing Alec in a kiss before he disappeared back beneath the sheets. 

The conversation on Alec’s mortality would probably never fully close, unless someone came up with a no strings attached answer for them. Until then Magnus intended to enjoy every second he had with Alec, and fffuuuuucccccckkkkkkk was Alec insistent on making it memorable.

**Author's Note:**

> They’re just the cutest, softest boys in the whole world and I love them. Thank you for taking the time to read this!


End file.
